Less Is More

As many of you know Julie (@iriefitgirl) is a guest blogger on Nobella Grace and I had to share this post. I have been working with Julie as my trainer for about a week, she put together the most amazing plan just for me. She knows my struggles (time, energy, eating enough during the whole day). I highly recommend her, and after you read this blog repost you will understand why, she is a woman who gets it.  

xoxo,

Kristi 

Why is it that we, as women, feel like we are “more” when we take up less space in the world? Have you ever thought about it that way?

This morning I was putting jeans on for the first time in 6 months. I was dreading it and I knew it was going to mess with my head once I finally did it. I think I had planned to get back to where my weight is more comfortable for me before I actually did the deed.

I walked into my closet assessing my jeans inventory to find out which pair was most likely to fit. Size 2…nope. Size 4…nope. Size 6…probably not and if it did it wouldn’t be pretty. Size 8…I guess it’s worth a try. Now, mind you, for someone of my size, an 8 is a healthy, fit size…far from “fat.” But these jeans used to fall off my body and now I’m thinking I’ll be lucky if I can cram my big ‘ole booty in there.

I did the mental prep – talking to myself about how it’s all going to be okay…as though not cramming my ass into this pair of jeans might end my world. Sad. I got the jeans on. Didn’t even have to lay down on the bed to button them. But…they were tight and they certainly weren’t going to fall off my body like the last time I wore them. It was an emotional moment and as I realized how tough it was for me to own this feeling I thought about it…why do I feel like “less is more?”

I know I’m not alone (especially in the world of physique competitors) and that is the reason I’m sharing this experience with you all. I know that I am a lot like many other women out there who struggle with fully accepting their bodies regardless of its current shape. As women, we are constantly transforming. Sometimes we carry more body fat than others. Sometimes that’s due to our life challenges that we may be dealing with or things like hormones from child birth to monthly cycles. We have days where nothing in our closet fits right and then we have our “skinny days” when all is right with the world.

I keep coming back to that question…WHY do we feel like more when we’re “less”? I don’t have an answer. I know that for me, personally, it’s not media or marketing or anything like that because I just don’t buy into that stuff. I know that I’m hardest on myself. I care about things that nobody else even sees. In discussions with many of my girlfriends I know this is a common feeling. We are our own worst enemy.

I don’t have an answer to the question right now, but this is kind of my year to get comfortable being uncomfortable. It’s my year to try to come to terms with my body in various shapes. I will do a powerlifting competition in May, so that means I’ll continue to carry a little extra body fat until then, despite my strong desire to start “cutting.” In October, I will step on stage to compete in Figure again, which means I’ll need to get as lean as possible. And then…I am committed to bringing my weight and body fat up to a healthy, maintainable level…without having to be overly strict with my diet and cardio. (This is something I always struggle with post-contest)

I know we are not designed to be perfect so we have to find a way to make peace with and accept and love ourselves in all our imperfections.